Tones Of Blue

Dawn breaks upon me

With a honey gold hue;

As I blow out for thee,

All I see is a pale blue.

 

Sun climbs up the sky,

Clouds follow as if on cue;

As I look out for thee,

All I see is sky blue.

 

Leaves bow down to noon,

Rays scorching hot fall on;

As I watch out for thee,

All I see is azure blue.

 

Down the sky walks the sun,

Aiming for horizon west;

As I wonder about thee,

All I see is ocean blue.

 

Evening floats gently in,

Shrouded in lilting tunes;

As I sing out for thee,

All I see is crystal blue.

 

Stars cluster the night sky,

On and off they wink;

As I call out for thee,

All I see is ink blue.

 

Dreams catch me at midnight

Smiling on me whilst I sleep;

As I reach out for thee,

All I see is deep blue.

 

Wishing hard with a sigh,

I stood by my gate;

As I wait alone for thee,

All I see is a faded blue.

 

Archives – 20 August, 2005
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I Know Not

I know not the ways of the world

I know not the plays of the world

I know not the faces of the world

I am, but, the small child

I wish, but, to grow up;

I like, but, to be the child

I hate, but, when I don’t live up,

To what I should be;

Among the multitude of forms I know,

The child in me takes the silly,

The boy in me take the amusing,

The mature mind leaves it alone.

 

Vijay Sankar

2006

A Course of Hope

That smile greeted him every day. A smile that came from the heart, reflected in the eyes and radiated joy. Every day he wondered if the smile was meant for him, or did she smile like that always? How could he ever know? To know he would need to ask her. It was too much for the introvert in him. As outgoing as he seemed to be, deep within he was shy and kept his thoughts to himself.

It was a few years since he saw that smile for the first time. He still remembered the smile, the sparkle in the eyes and the whiff of perfume as she passed by. He believed in the power of positive energy, and he got it in plenty that day. He looked forward to the smile every time they passed by each other. It fell into a comfortable routine. A routine for years without a word exchanged.

He was always caught in two minds. Should he begin the conversation? Or should he not? He always held back the urge to talk. What if she was merely being polite? What if she just wished to pass on a smile and did not ever think of conversation? He didn’t want to make a fool of himself. Silence waved its golden wand, and the routine was always on course.

***        ***                                                        ***        ***                                        ***        ***

He never knew how he mustered the courage to talk. It just happened. It was destined to be so. It came by naturally. He loved the beauty of it. The way life unfurled its surprises. The conversations flowed. He felt the connection to be electric. It struck a chord deep in his heart. As always, he was not sure if it was the same on the other side. The dilemma again – to ask or not? Or was he just thinking too much?

The thoughts came in waves, crashing onto his mind. Unable to bear the onslaught, he decided to put it out to her. She replied. The feeling was mutual. It gave him so much relief. It made him feel light. It was not about falling in love. It was not about getting attracted. It was not about the rush of adrenaline.

The chord that tied them together would stay. Friendship, they say, is a blessing!

***        ***                                                        ***        ***                                        ***        ***

He woke up with a start. Dreams had a certain mystic energy about them. The phone buzzed. There were scores of messages wishing him on his birthday. He browsed through them, searching for one. Seven or seventy, the feeling was still the same. He kept hoping for a message.

He looked outside the window to see his family playing in the morning sun. He loved the beauty of it. They were all here to celebrate his birthday. Seventy years is a long time. He would enjoy it with friends and family. A grand celebration, fun and frolic, a few drinks with friends, a few songs to mark the occasion. Make more memories. For eternity.

At the end of it all, he would long for the wish that never came. The routine was still on course. Full steam ahead. Aye aye, Captain!

..glow..

The word glow brings me images of sunsets I watch from my fourth floor balcony. Sunsets are quite an experience. The clouds, the colours, birds flying back to their nests, the cool breeze. And along with all that, at a corner of the mind there is hope that the next sunset would find us in better mood, in better spirits.

 

Icebreaker

Toastmasters is a platform that I joined recently in my organization.

Cross-posting the transcript of my first speech – The Icebreaker

The Icebreaker

“All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players:

They have their exits and entrances;

And one man in his time plays many parts”

Good Evening Toastmasters and guests,

These lines from the play “As You Like It” by William Shakespeare suggest that each stage in a person’s life calls him/her to play a different role. Let me take you through some of the many parts Shakespeare talked about! I am Vijay Sankar, and back in May 1984, I was born in this city – Trivandrum.

I walked half a kilometre to my school – Loyola. The years in Loyola laid the foundation – for my interests, for my character and life, in general. I tasted failure quite early at school by failing for an exam in first grade. My mother, who was nursing my infant brother at that time, was completely taken aback when she realized that the first grade of my times was quite different from theirs. Thanks to her prayers, I never disappointed her again in similar fashion.

As a school kid my ambition was to become a space engineer, my parents being scientist engineers at ISRO. Watching or reading about rocket launches by ISRO still gives me goosebumps every time.

My father introduced me to a library for children – FunTime Library. A small room full of books opened the world of literature and an even bigger world of imagination to me! My love for books continue to this day, and I hope it stays so, forever!

My time in Loyola helped me develop a few facets – I became a sportsman, a writer, a performer and an academic – probably in that order. Some parts still remain! Loyola blessed me with outstanding teachers, loyal friends and fond memories.

I walked again – this time from home to College of Engineering, Trivandrum. College was a different experience, especially for someone stepping in from a boys’ school. I took quite some time to break the shell. Strikes, bunking classes, combined study sessions when exams arrive, sports and cultural events. It was fun.

Somewhere along, the space engineer dream lost the race to the IT boom. I accepted the offer from Infosys and joined their Mysore campus in 2005. A grueling but enjoyable six months of training in Mysore, followed by another month of training in Chennai.

Finally, I was posted in Bangalore. It was my first stint away from home. From the luxury of having homemade food to being content with food from restaurants. There was a bright side to it – I was able to appreciate my mother’s culinary skills better.

In a couple of years, my transfer to Trivandrum materialized. I have been here ever since. The last two years have been spent with an enthusiastic bunch here at Oracle.

My interest in photography was rekindled while in Infosys. It has been journey of discovery in many ways: I made new friends, learned to appreciate finer detail, connected better with nature, observed people. I also learned to appreciate classical dance, Kathakali and other traditional art forms.

Along the way, I met Amrutha, when I was requested to record her violin performance for an event in Infosys. She became my wife in later years and continues to enthrall me with the violin.

My little brother, Unnikrishnan, gets the largest piece of my heart. My family revolves around him. I was excited to welcome him as a baby to the family. But soon, I felt something amiss about him. I couldn’t quite understand why my parents gave him so much of their attention – to the extent of ignoring me many a time.

As I grew up, my mother explained about his epilepsy and dyslexia. From that day on, I became his protector. My mother gave up her career in ISRO to look after him. She ensured his successful completion of high school and higher secondary education. His struggle continues, and our efforts to support him have never taken a back seat.

My family brands me short-tempered, impulsive. My friends say otherwise. It is my zodiac sign, you know. Gemini!

Let me conclude with the words of Ella Wheeler Wilcox

“Don’t look for the flaws as you go through life;

And even when you find them,

It is wise and kind to be somewhat blind

And look for the virtue behind them.”

Thank You!

.. wall texture ..

The moment I stepped into the room, the pattern on the walls struck me. The different shapes, the play of lights and shadows. My thought was that it looked like a motif from an ancient era! 

Holiday Inn Express & Suites

Gachibowli, Hyderabad

Textures – my first post for a photo challenge 

So Long, My Friend!

She closed the door of the car, looked at me and smiled. Her eyes reflected the depths of despair, the emotional turmoil simmering beneath. I wanted to reach out to her once more, to take her hand and reassure her. It would never be enough to fill the void, though!

As she walked down the road, a part of me walked out with her. It would be long before I see her again. I wish I could be with her, to be the shoulder to lean on. I wish I could drive her around one more time. I wish I could sit with her at the beach one more time. I wish I could hold her one more time. The wavy hair, the naughty smile, the bubbly laughter, the warmth of her hug. The moments stayed on with echoes of her emotion. She looked back before I could call out to her. A wave, and a smile. And she was gone.

The journey back was hard and lonely. Driving through the lanes and roads which we had travelled just an hour before. The frames played out everywhere. The actions, the words, the feelings, the music. They would forever be etched in memory. Those moments created soulful melodies I had never heard before. Interspersed with melancholy notes, a reminder of reality.

She was trying to balance her emotions all through. She came for me, to take time out for me. Though she was crushed within, her smile had cheered me. It was as much about her, as it was about me. The struggle to come to terms with the loss, the battle to fill the vacuum. I wanted to be of help, but she didn’t let me be. Or did she? Time would tell me someday, maybe.

An angel keeps watch over her, shining bright in the sky. Her guiding light and guardian.

The traffic around faded into oblivion, and the sounds receded into the background. Her smile, and the wave remained, along with the warmth and affection.

So long, my friend! Till next time!